Maintaining a healthy relationship is always a challenge, so don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. Whenever someone mentions that people used to stay together in previous eras, just stress out the word HEALTHY, which they prefer to ignore when interpreting the facts.
Today, however, there are a lot of challenges that are completely new. We’re talking about the challenges of the digital era and here are a few such problems that modern couples are facing.
Tracker apps
In the modern day and age, all it takes for a spouse to track you and learn all they need to know about your online behavior is for them to download a simple app on your phone. This way, they can see where you are, read your texts, and more. These cheating spouse tracker apps are getting more and more popular.
The biggest difference between the current state of affairs and what came before is that they don’t have to install a ton of devices, just one app. In other words, there are no bugs for you to discover, and no cameras in flower pots. It’s just one app on your phone, hiding in a myriad of others, that you won’t be able to discover as easily.
You see, these apps are so hard to discover. You won’t notice a suspicious car tracking you or a wall ornament that’s different than what you expected. Even when you go to processes, you won’t recognize it if you don’t already know the name of the app.
This might be illegal and erode trust when discovered. First of all, you legally have the right to install a tracking app only on the phone of someone you have legal guardianship over. Second, what if you don’t find a thing and you’re caught? Well, your relationship might not have been in crisis… but now it is.
Digital infidelity
A lot of people believe that what is cheating is a question with a simple answer. However, this is because they don’t really think about the place where they draw this line.
For instance, would you say that watching porn is cheating?
Some people would say yes, and others would say no. So, if no, would watching live-cams be considered cheating? More people would answer yes but a lot of people would still go with no. How about private one-on-one live? If the answer to this question is also no, what if this is a random person online doing it for free? If the answer is still no, what if this is not a random person but someone they know in real life?
We expanded this gradually to show you that, in the digital world and the world of digital media, drawing a line in the sand is not easy.
If we jumped from porn to erotic video calling a coworker, this would be a clear split, but there are so many nuances and steps before that.
AI girlfriends
Some people form emotional bonds with AI. This is not surprising; people grow attached to fictional characters all the time. They fall in love with characters from video games, movies they watch, or even actors they see on TV.
However, now, there’s a new threat. AI girlfriends are customizable conversation bots (chatbots) that can pass almost every Turing test. They can provide comfort and understanding, but they can also send (AI-generated) or lewd texts.
This would be a problem for many partners, even though some see its positive aspects.
In some instances, this can provide a partner with a chance to engage in a “virtual” affair instead of having to commit real adultery to step out of the relationship's bounds.
Also, an AI girlfriend can feel like a real relationship for one person. There are no arguments and no compromises. You can turn this bot into a person whose interests and sensibilities always align with those of your own. If you want, you can even argue with it.
The biggest two problems (other than the fact that some will still see this as an act of infidelity) are that it can lead to neglect of your real partner and that it blurs the line between fantasy and reality.
Gaming addiction
Partners who spend excessive time in online games may unintentionally neglect their relationships. While gaming is a fun source of escapism, it becomes an issue when hours are spent in the virtual world, leaving little time for real-life connections. The imbalance in question can leave the other partner feeling ignored and unimportant.
Ideally, they would be gamers or backseat gamers themselves, but what if that’s not the case or if they want to do things offline, as well?
Online games provide emotional rewards that can actually compete with real relationships. Many games are designed to offer immediate gratification, achievements, and a sense of accomplishment, which is opposite to how you have to struggle to make something out of your conventional relationship.
Gaming addiction often creates isolation and distance between couples. When one person is deeply involved in their virtual world, the real-life relationship suffers. Shared activities and meaningful conversations take a backseat, leaving the other partner feeling disconnected and emotionally distant. This can cause friction that can be nearly impossible to resolve.
Addressing gaming addiction can be tricky because it’s often seen as a harmless hobby. This can be used as a motte and bailey debating tactic, where they give examples of other successful people who have this hobby, completely overlooking the fact that it’s ruining their own relationship.
Over-reliance on texting
Texting can lead to misunderstandings because tone and body language are missing. What might be a light-hearted comment can come across as rude or dismissive because you don’t have the non-verbal communication to fall back to. These small miscommunications, when piled up over time, can create unnecessary tension and frustration in a relationship, sometimes blowing up into bigger conflicts.
A lot of important conversations get postponed or avoided when texting is the main form of communication. Some things need to be discussed face-to-face, but texting makes it easy to put off those tough conversations. Avoiding
Relying too much on texting makes it harder to build meaningful face-to-face communication. The ease of sending a quick message prevents deeper, more meaningful conversations from happening. Over time, this reliance on digital interactions can weaken the emotional bond and communication skills between partners.
Then, there are so many texting games. Waiting for x minutes before you respond, reading the notification so that the message status doesn’t change to “seen” so that you can pretend you didn’t see the message… it goes on and on. Sure, there are games in real-world communication, but they’re different.
Finding solutions to these new challenges takes time and patience
The truth is that most of these problems are really not that unique. Sure, tracker apps were not there, but it’s not like people didn’t spy on their partners before. Even before gaming, people spent too much time fishing, shopping, or watching TV, which sometimes got in the way of developing meaningful relationships.
Of course, over-reliance on texting and AI girlfriends is relatively new, and even digital infidelity can be seen as a relatively new thing (if you choose to be nitpicky).
The bottom line is that these problems are new, but they’re real, and they’ll take time to solve.
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